We are in the countdown. Now that we’ve arrived in the merry, merry month of May, kids are counting down the number of days until school is out. We count down the number of days until vacation. We count down the number of days to retirement. We countdown the days until a wedding. NASA space shuttles engage in a countdown prior to blast off and who doesn’t love the countdown that occurs on New Year’s Eve. 5-4-3-2-1… until the ball drops in Times Square and everybody finds someone to kiss as they ring in the New Year.
That seems to be the natural order of things. We use count downs because we anticipate something great is going to happen. Generally, that something is a positive event. There is one big event for which we don’t do a countdown. That event is the arrival of a baby. From the time you learn you are pregnant, you are not counting down. You are counting up. The goal is to hold that baby in the womb, the perfect environment for development, for 40 weeks, three trimesters, 280 days.
Every woman I know has been eager for the big day to arrive. You don’t often run into someone who tells you how many weeks are left in the pregnancy because you don’t know when delivery day might arrive. Instead, you count up until you arrive at the “safe zone,” usually 38 weeks. The fact is, you aren’t always completely clear as to when the pregnancy actually started. All you know is that you want that baby to receive the maximum 40 weeks so that their development will be as complete as possible. That means counting up. “I’m 12 weeks along. Time to tell our friends.” “I’ve hit the 2nd trimester and boy have I gotten my energy back.” “I’m eight and a half months pregnant and the doctor says any time now.” Counting up.
There is another event for which we count up and that’s counting the Omer. The ancient rabbis say we are counting toward the time when we receive Torah. Beginning with the 2nd day of Pesach, we begin to count up according to Leviticus 23:15-16.
“And from the day on which you bring the sheaf of elevation offering–the day after the sabbath [Pesach]–you shall count off seven weeks They must be complete: you must count until the day after the seventh week–fifty days; then you shall bring an offering of new grain to the LORD.”
The Israelites lived through the 49 days. They didn’t know where they were headed or what would be there when they arrived. They were physically free, but they were on a journey to be spiritually free as well. Exodus 19:1 says,
“On the third new moon after the Israelites had gone forth from the land of Egypt on that very day, they entered the wilderness of Sinai.”
Pharaoh ordered them out of Egypt and Moses declared the new moon the first month of the year. Two new moons later, on the 6th of third month, they arrived at Sinai and camped at the foot of the mountain. Here God would give them the Torah.
We commemorate this period of time between Pesach and Shavuot when we celebrate the giving of Torah, by examining ourselves while counting the Omer. Torah is the defining aspect of the Jewish people. It gives us examples of people who lived according to it and those who didn’t. It doesn’t glorify the Patriarchs and Matriarchs as perfect individuals nor does it require us to be perfect. Rather, this time between these two holidays is to be dedicated to getting ourselves ready to truly receive it. We remember the physical freedom that came when the Israelites left Egypt on Pesach. What follows is the trials involved in achieving the kind of spiritual freedom that comes after we are physically free from whatever holds us back.
The Midrash compares this time between the celebration of Pesach and Shavuot to the situation of a child who is gravely ill. His father gives him time to recuperate before sending him back to school. When the Israelites walked out of Egypt they were a broken people, still stuck in a slave mentality. God decided to give them healing time before He presented them with the lessons of Torah. They needed to be healed before they could engage.
Another sage, Levi Yitzhak of Berdichev, views it differently. He said that if the Israelites had received Torah immediately after they walked through the Reed Sea on dry land, they would have accepted Torah based on gratitude for the miracles God performed. God wanted to wait until they were strong enough to complain–and boy, did they complain–before He could be sure that their acceptance and commitment was a totally voluntary act.
The Sages say the Israelites were physically freed in Pesach, in that first month of the year, but they weren’t spiritually free until Sinai. The same is true for us and so, we count up as a gestational time for us to be as fully developed as we can be.
We are in the 2nd week of counting the Omer. Last week we focused on all aspects of Chesed (חסד) or Kindness. This week, we are focused on Din/G’vurah (דִין/כּוֹחַ) or Judgment and Power. Neither of these attributes are necessarily associated with goodness in today’s world. However, both are necessary for the proper functioning of society. We need to exercise judgment as discretion. You can use good judgment in the decisions you make, or you can take it to the max being judgmental and disparaging of others.
Power also carries negative connotations. Those who are drunk with power are focused entirely on controlling those around them. However, power is also necessary for the implementation of goodness.
Consequently, we are to spend this week asking ourselves if we have allowed our ego to run unchecked? Do we put limits on ourselves and our desires? Interestingly enough, this is also the week during which we memorialize those who were killed in the Holocaust. That was the ultimate disaster in terms of humans taking power and placing judgment on others to the absolute max.
In Pirkei Avot 4:1, we read what Ben Zoma taught. “Who is strong? Those who control their instincts…Who is honored? Those who honor their fellow human beings.”
As we count the days and the weeks to Shavuot and the celebration of the giving of Torah, may we focus on the aspects of our character that need refinement. We also begin the parashah K’doshim which contains one of the most critical commandments God ever gave: “You shall be holy, for I, the LORD your God, am holy.” (Leviticus 19:2). Keep in mind, it doesn’t demand perfection. It doesn’t say “be holy AS I am holy.” It says to be holy because GOD is holy. And being holy doesn’t mean being perfect. It means being kodesh (קדוש) or “set apart” from the world. We learn in the parashah all the behaviors required of one who wishes to be set apart.
Count up the days in your gestation to become a better person. Consider how you might use judgment and power to effect good in this world. Shavua tov. Have a good week
I Am My Father's Daughter 